I am going to put this out there and get it off my chest. I don’t like my birthday, and today is in fact, the day. Before you write me off as a cynical, grumpy, older-20-something-year-old, give me a chance. I don’t complain about my birthday in hopes of more wishes, gifts, and attention. In fact, I usually let the day pass by with hopes that no one will remember or acknowledge it’s the day.
So why are birthdays falling into the overrated bin? Let’s count the ways…
1. Birthdays have too much hype. I suppose it’s semi-like Christmas time. You spend all year long looking forward to the day, and more often than not it’s a big one-night-stand style let down.
2. As you open your mailbox on your birthday morning, heart full of hope, you are quickly slapped back into reality as you open the never-changing birthday card with a crisp $20.00 bill inside. While the monetary exchange is welcomed, you can’t help but feel like the day is an obligation to others.
3. I spent most of my childhood birthdays sick as a dog. My family always planned amazing, awe-inspiring parties for my birthday, yet I could never enjoy them. Whether it was the birthday I starred as the Hunchback of Notre Dame’s twin (covered from head to toe in disfiguring poison oak bubbles), or the birthday I watched my throw up splash around in the back-seat of the station wagon, my birthdays always left a lot to be desired.
4. When you’re an adult, it’s just another work day. ‘Nuff said.
5. You take things more personally on your birthday. Despite risking your life daily in the morning commute, when that too-cool-for-speed-limits driver blows past your car and almost side-swipes you, on your birthday it hurts your ego just a *tiny* bit more. “If they knew it was my birthday, they’d feel bad…”
6. We silently dream all year of the magical day where it feels like pots of gold are free-flowing in the backyard. Then you slam your funny-bone on the door-frame and realize your birthday isn’t some big celebration time… it’s just a day on the calendar.
7. You realize what you haven’t accomplished yet. When I was 16 years old, I thought by this age I would be married, working on having a child, buying a house, and finishing off my doctorate. Now, don’t get me wrong: my life is beyond blessed. However, I am not married, I’m kid-less for now, I pay a mortgage-sized rent (kind of close to owning a home), and I’m chugging away at a master’s degree. No doctor here, except maybe Doctor of Awesome.
Every party needs a pooper, that’s why we invited you. Party pooper, party pooper!