Frozen In Time.

The human brain is truly an awe-inspiring organism. I first had this thought as an undergraduate in a Behavioral Neuroscience class. The professor was excitedly jumping from one end of the chalkboard to the other, drawing thick white circles around brain areas and their corresponding functions.

The course took place over an oppressively hot summer; the days endlessly dwindled into the night, offering only a few degrees of cooler air in remorse. Sitting in brick-lined classrooms overlooking the Boston Harbor, I would find myself locked into the Professor’s words and unique habits for improving student memorization.

Amygdala. Amy G Dala. “Amy is a new college student learning the lay of the campus. She will need to remember the campus and keep calm. Class! The purpose of the amygdala is memorization and emotional reactions!”

Yes, this ridiculously beautiful view is where I attended college. All for half the cost of a private school - let's mull over that one.

Yes, this ridiculously beautiful view is where I attended college. All for half the cost of a private school – let’s mull over that one.

While my breeze-filled college evenings are behind me, the intricacies of the human brain still stop me in my tracks regularly. It begs for consideration, thoughtfulness, and possibly even admiration. And when one’s brain wants attention, it will stop at nothing to take it.

Since the Boston bombings and horrific events which took place following, my brain has been frozen in time. Wake up, get dressed, go to work, do graduate school work, write an article, drive home, make dinner, exercise, go to sleep. My actions are in auto-drive, pushing me through the days’ tasks, bringing me closer to the moment my head can meet the pillow, where all is right in the world again.

credit: hipstercrite.com

credit: hipstercrite.com

I’ve been quiet lately. My words are escaping me. I can see words dutifully traveling from my brain to my fingertips and sailing out the tops, laughing as they remind me my brain is freeze-down mode; no artistic or creative enjoyment will happen.

But the most beautiful aspect of the human brain is the ability to regenerate. Build new synapses, create new neurons, and build better relationships between neurotransmitters. In layman’s terms, build new bridges of opportunity, create new avenues, and build better relationships for linking to life.

Find my voice.
Find my words.
Return to myself.

8 responses to “Frozen In Time.

  1. I felt the same way after Columbine, and then again after a huge wildfire devastated part of my hometown last summer. It take a while to fully comprehend the scale and horror of disasters like the Boston bombing. Yet, as you said, the brain regenerates and builds new bridges, and you will eventually return to yourself — and I’m glad you’re being gentle with yourself in the meantime.

    • Thank you! I am trying to be gentle — focusing on my work and school, but I feel so uninspired. Sleep is my biggest motivating factor right now in life, and that’s just not “me”. I usually love action, the outdoors, writing, creativity… I am just so flat right now. Here’s hoping that with more time and sensitivity to myself, the moments will pass quickly!

  2. I know! You have put into words the way I have been feeling to! And I didn’t even understand why. I don’t normally watch the news at all, but the bombing sucked me back into the cold, harsh reality of this world and got me discouraged. Thank you for writing what I”m feeling. very comforting.

  3. She is one vain, vaunted girl who can get vengeful, Amy G Dala.

  4. hownottokillyourparents

    I just thought you’d like to know that I’m sending the Best Moment Award your way. You can check it out here: http://hownottokillyourparents.wordpress.com/2013/05/07/a-shiny-new-award/ .

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